very big green things

i have this weird way of judging movies. special effects never really did anything for me. give me a clever story and intelligent dialog any day. that was until my son and i saw the hulk movie last weekend. did you see it? weren’t those effects about as cheap looking as they come? sure made me appreciate good ones. like remember the original star trek series on tv? now THOSE were special effects! but back to the hulk. it wasn’t the lame effects that bugged me. it wasn’t that he could grow to 10 times his size so fast (like where did all those extra molecules come from anyway)? it didn’t even phase me that he could survive a free-fall from the edge of space into the san francisco bay and make a splash smaller than my attempts at doing a cannonball from low diving board. nope…here’s what got to me. when he got bigger all his clothes burst off EXCEPT HIS UNDERPANTS! and then when he got smaller, the undies shrunk along with him. except for one time, when we got to see his human buttocks. i mean, come on movie making people. if you’re gonna show gratuitous nakedity, at least make it the girl for cryin out loud. duhhhh!

speaking of gross green things, during my recent trip to florida and maine (to us westerners the east coast is just a big los angeles), i was hanging around my friend’s house in florida while she worked, and decided to swim in the pool. i noticed this statue like thing at the bottom of the pool

and thought i’d dive down to investigate. and no…i didn’t hear the audience screaming “NOOOO….DON’T GO DOWN THERE!”. so i dive down and the first thing i notice is that this thing ain’t no statue. it’s swaying with the water. hmmm…better grab one of her kid’s masks and get a better look (could this guy be any dumber?). so down i go with the mask, and let me tell you i don’t like what i see. please, let it be a rubber pool toy. but i’m not taking any more chances. i could drag this out but i’ve already written plenty. so to cut to the chase, the thing was a live dead frog about the size of your average rottweiller. it had been floating for a week or so, but nobody thought to clean it out, and eventually it just sank (sunk?) to the bottom, where i made its acquaintance.

the problem here is obvious. if i start to turn green, i won’t know if it’s from some radioactive science experiment gone haywire or from swimming with a dead frog.

anyway, here are a few more interesting pics i took in florida…

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